Stilled.

Your embrace make it
way past my broken bones
to touch my tired soul
I feel myself being whole.
For the first time in ages
I felt beautiful being vulnerable.

You’ve got the spirit of the sunrise
The drive that keeps me up in the morning
I can’t help but believe in destiny
A fool, I think the uncertainties
Created bridges that led you to me

I keep losing myself as waves
Of missing someone rush in the wee hours
But now I find myself almost
clean, and hopeful again,
Closer to the light I missed.

I stopped running away
when you took my hand.
Invincible from three am ghosts.
Tears no longer need to fall
Finally, warmth from all this cold.

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There’s silence that beats all the noise you hated to hear
When you wish you can turn back every moment,
Wish you can change the words you’ve said,
As if he is a word, a sentence away
and if you could have been more careful-

You wish you have not tried to break his walls
Or even shook them,
Or maybe, built sturdier ones around yourself
Because you can feel them crash down.
Wish you weren’t reckless
To risk everything and fall.

You know you’re doomed when there is distance-
Inches that beat any other mile ever measured.
Inches, yet you feel so far from him
Inches, yet you’ve never felt so invisible
Only inches, yet you can’t seem to get close.

Now you’re forced to let go,
Let go of what has already slipped away on its own.
Let go of realities you cannot change
Let go of someone who never was yours
You’re forced to, or you just know
It’s all that’s left for you to do.

But you can’t turn your back on everything
And you’re stuck trying to see him
From the point were you stand,
And refuse to go forward.
You can’t seem to move on
And linger on every emotion,
And choose to be frozen in time.

Drift away
Stop returning like waves
that wash away
all the castles I try to build.
Can’t you see how much
I try to forget our memories

Don’t look back
until I finally learn
it’s not worth the wait
’til the hate anchored
to this love lifts.
until the day I’m free

For now, I won’t look
at the stars and wish,
won’t look at sunsets
and get my hopes up
because it’s that easy
to fall for you again.

Have you ever got that feeling when you wish you can turn back time
even just for a day, or an hour-
back to an exact moment you wish didn’t have ┬áto slip away?
Go back to that point in time
and let all the feelings loose,
because in a handful of days
there are those when you linger
on the existence of that moment,
but feel helpless knowing
it will never happen again-
The instances when nostalgia
fills in the cracks made
from questions you failed to ask-
in between the days where
you’re so sure
that you’re already okay.

You’ve become part of solitude
Though I can’t quite determine
Whether you’re my shadow or the silence.
You are what sets apart
Alone from being lonely.

I’ve been looking for that word
To describe how I feel.
You became that kind of rest
I have always craved
That sleep can never satisfy.

Strange it is to know
That my heart have been beating
For the longest time
But I only realized that
When you started touching it
And kept some parts for yourself.

Ianesha

She’s in a universe where
She surfs with the waves
She made friends with, as if
It never tried to break her
When they first met.

She left the guy
Who created oceans
From her pretty eyes.
His white lies-
I wonder if she’s freed
From his goodbye?

He made a mistake
When he let her go-
The world is still trying
Its best to replace a gem,
But she has beauty
No luck could ever recreate.

The wind knows well
How she is missed
I still wonder if it’ll ever
Carry her home again,
Because I still whisper
Enfolded in a wish she’ll hear,
That I’m still waiting.

Sa pagbalik ko sa ating simula,
May natagpuang distansya
Bakit hindi sumagi sa isipan
Na ang bawat hakbang pasulong
Pinahihina rin ng pagsubok?

Lumalawak na ang pagitan,
Gawin man ang lahat,
Habulin ma’y parang sinulid
Na sa bawat pilit na paghatak
Ang nasimula’y lalong nawawasak

Inanod na ng mga alon
Na minsa’y nagawa namang umayon
At dahil kailanma’y di sinukat,
Paglayo’y di mabigyang paliwanag-
Bagama’t di rin handang magpaalam.

Kung hindi na mapipigilan
At itinadhana na ang paglisan
Magawa ko mang ika’y talikuran,
Ito’y dahil gusto lang balikan
Ang mga bahaging ‘yong naiwan.

Momentum

There was something-
I remembered,
Your gaze told me everyday
won’t be like the other.
Your smile used to
drive the doubts away
just when I’m about
to break down.
Once we’re two points
set for the same direction.

Late nights we spent
on your compositions,
Revealed dispositions
and strawberry dreams-
We skipped sleep
I was Wendy to believe
Will my name in your
songs never grow old?
Have you ever delved
back into twenty-twelve?

Do the first three planets
still remind you of me?
And the records
do they still ever
give music its life
the way it did when
we used to sing along,
now that my reveries
are distant memories?

In the corner of my mind
lies a place where,
(though I loathed science)
lives the formula, the variables
equating to momentum-
constant, a thing we
both knew by heart.
Although nobody knows
why it’s something
we still lost.